The whole bullying thing is sadly a breakdown in communication between people. On one side is the subject of the bullying who doesn't deserve to be a target and doesn't understand the context of what is being said about them. On the other side are the people who are saying things for suspicious reasons and have attempted to use the person they are subjecting taunts to as a way to connect.
If you want to know something about another person, ask them if they will share with you. Do it in the context of respect and privacy. Recognize that you don't have the right to know things that other people don't want to share and you can't force them to share. It is frustrating, but that is the reality. The best perspective is to put yourself in their position and see how you would react. You can't expect to be perfect, but it is a better place to start from rather than make random speculative statements about that person.
Don't let bad communication turn your intentional concern and inquiry in to an attack on a person's character.